ugh, i take it back

my hearts a'melting.

today, so not good.

I hate that there are types of people. Its very misleading.

Also, im rather discouraged today.

and conflicted.

also im pretty sure i ate a rotten egg about 72 hours ago, which i am still feeling the effects of.

tomorrow, hopefully will be better.

I am feeling very unsure of myself as of late, which is unusual. I mean i suppose i second guess myself just as much as the next person, but today for some reason it hit me.

It got me thinking that all the events and misfortunes of this year have all been bent on a personality flaw, and well, that really hurts to think about.

I wonder if it isnt that i was with the same person for so long. really, who knows. But either way, i cant shake teh feeling that im sabotaging myself.

random fact of the day...

the word sabotage come from the french word sabot, which can mean shoe. During the industrial revolution, a lot of french workers were being replaced by machines and a sort of paranoia insued....

Some workers would throw a shoe into the gears to break the machines.

Thus, sabotage.

wordsmith through and through.

I think tomorrow i will get coffee, and while i get coffee, i will use this time to evaluate who I am, and who I want to be. What i know about myself and what i dont. What i have lost because of my own actions and insecurities, and what i have gained. A master pros and cons list if you will, and most definately, life goals.

tomorrow is a day of lists.